Self Criticism

Why do we put expectations on ourselves that we would never think to put on anyone else?  “Be hard on yourself, but don’t beat the shit out of yourself” – Marc Maron from his podcast the other day with Bruce Springsteen. Words that I really needed to hear. I walk a fine line between productive criticism and unproductive bullying of myself. I expect a lot from myself because I know I’m capable of it, but I have to remember to allow myself room for error, room to learn and grow. I will not be perfect at everything the first time I do it. When a new person comes into the gym, who has never worked out before, I would not expect them to be able to do a muscle up, or heck even a pull up just yet. We would start small; inverted row, kneeling pull-up, band assisted and then finally a pull-up. Yet when it comes to myself I have a hard time taking that same baby step approach. I don’t mean just when it comes to exercise, but life in general.

Being a health coach & personal trainer I sometimes (most of the time) think I am suppose to have all the answers. I am suppose to know everything AND be doing everything perfect. I should be the epitome of health.  As I’m writing this I was distracted by instagram, of course, and came across a progress photo from an online coach I have been following for a long time. A woman that I have a lot of respect for and truly appreciate what she’s doing in this field. Anyway, on her caption she said “every coach needs a coach”. It’s not the first time I’ve seen her say that, but oh how fitting those words are to me right now. This, this is what I have a hard time with. It’s not that I don’t want to get better as an athlete or a coach or a person in general. I’m always trying to improve myself in all aspects of life. Yet I feel like it needs to a secret journey. If i’m not the picture perfect definition of health, why would anyone want to work with me? Well that I can’t worry about. All I can worry about is staying hard on myself without beating the shit out of myself. Remembering to be proud of my accomplishments, as small as they may be, but never satisfied. AND not being afraid to ask for help. Maybe that should be one of my goals for 2017, stop being afraid to ask for help. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness or being unintelligent, in fact it can be a sign of strength. Team work makes the dream work, right?


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